Friday, February 5, 2010

The Big Cave In

"Could I get some lambs liver please? Enough for one person."
Two or three slices then.
"Uhm I suppose so"
Sure you're a big fella. I'll give you four
"ehhhh. Thanks? So what's the best way to cook this then so that it doesn't taste like liver?"
You don't like liver? Liver's lovely.
"I haven't eaten it since I was a child and I don't think it'll be much better now than I remember."
Just dip it in flour. Stick it on the pan and cook it one minute each side.

Jaysus. One minute. It's bad enough that I'm going to eat liver, but now it turns out that I have to eat the damn thing raw...

One bite was all it took for the childhood memories to flood back. A chunk of baby courgette was used a chaser. This was a tad different to how 10 year old Private used to deal with the weekly liver dinner. Every inch of every piece of liver used to be smothered with tomato ketchup before it entered my mouth. Then every piece was followed up with a few mouthfuls of whatever else was on my plate until the taste of liver had subsided. Then it was back to the liver for another bite. Repeat until liver gone. This was the tactic I went for yesterday. Although, much like when I was a child, the rest of the dinner was finished while still a big chunk of liver remained. As a child there'd be four of sitting at the table, each staring at one lump of liver, refusing to eat it, and not being let leave the table until it was all finished. What felt like hours would pass, tears would eventually arrive and promises of deserts when it was all gone were made. No desert could make eating the rest of the liver worthwhile. Yesterday as I stared down at the last remaining slice of liver on my plate I felt myself starting to well up. Then suddenly I remembered that I had bought the liver, I had cooked the liver, and that I was sitting at my table in my apartment. With that I picked up the remaining liver and threw it in the bin....

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